Author of the novel WHEN YOU LOSE CONTROL

I've officially been diagnosed as neurodivergent.  I have severe ADHD and dyscalculia.  I am thrilled to have words, an explanation, and understanding. It's not just a matter of being or feeling crazy, there's a reason! I feel free and relieved. 

Be free and be you Gender is just a construct  We are all human

The glacial deposit, stemming from a kettle hole. Born of the clay, it came through.  A basin of peat moss. And heath shrubs, sedges And conifers.  Stagnant, oxygen deficient, vines thrive And burst from the wetland.  Pouring water, Pouring sand,  Laying dormant through Decemeber.  Then harsh winter and hard ice, the chemistry of the frosty season. Dormancy ends when spring begins  And bring the buzzes of the bees and thus,  bobbing berries

Eldritch baby demon, With one cruel florid eye. Broke in by the windowsill, What bid you to come by? Creeping with your green claws, Forced here from down below. Riding on the hellfires Eerily lit, aglow. Fears cobbled together, creating  Monster of bruised and cobalt face.  With wispy hair of smoke, Breaking in to make your case. The Mephistophelian mission  With the terror that you bring, Intruder from nine circles and horror- Are you of Dante or King?

Post taken down...for now

It isn't so bad Got a nice four day weekend Let's be positive 

What is next weeks plan I really don't want to know Already such dread 

Super Bowl XXXii was Denver versus Green Bay, and my Baldwinville Elementary classroom was abuzz with talk of who would win the game.  I was the shy new kid with glasses, making me a 90s sitcom of cliches. I did, however, like football, and so did the cutest boy in my class. He sat near me in most classes- thank you alphabetized seating- and when he included me in the Super Bowl conversation, I was thrilled. "Who do you thinks gonna win?" Swoon! Score! The hot kids talking to me!! "I think Green Bay." "No way! Denver will!" "Nah, I don't think so, no chance." "Wanna bet?" "Yeah, let's bet!" He looked surprised but smiled, and we shook hands.  "You're on," I declared, making a mental note never to wash my hand ever again.  That Sunday night, I sat down to watch the game, but my dad, in charge of the remote, wasn't that interested since the Patriots weren't playing. He tuned in now and then, and I...

"We get it, dad; we can call him Al." -Kevin Pearson, This Is Us You Can Call Me Al came on the radio today, and it made me laugh because I'm frustrated with so many things, and it came on at such a perfect time.  The first few lines just...they just hit right: " A man walks down the street He says, "Why am I soft in the middle, now? Why am I soft in the middle? The rest of my life is so hard I need a photo-opportunity I want a shot at redemption Don't want to end up a cartoon In a cartoon graveyard"

**SPOILERS** For The Power of the Dog Every year, I watch all the movies that are nominated for the best picture Oscar. Last night, I watched The Power of The Dog, and wow, do I have some feelings.  First of all, I have to say that I wanted to love this movie. I freaking love the Oscars, and I love the three actors who were nominated for the film. Kirsten Dunst is an actress I've adored since she played Amy March, Jesse Plemmons was fabulous in Breaking Bad, and holy crap, do I love Benedict Cumberbatch. When he didn't win the Oscar for The Imitation Game, I almost cried. Anyway, I sat down last night to watch, expecting to enjoy TPoTD and be wowed. Not even close.  In a nutshell, I hated the movie. A two-hour and eight-minute movie somehow felt like six. Intentional? Fine. It parallels what I'm sure was a hard and long and tiring existence in 1920s Montana. But that's not the problem. Or the reason I felt like I needed four showers after that movie. Peter. Oh my God, c...

"Playing the victim card blinds you to your own flaws and so you can never improve. Self pity is the easiest way to create unilateral misery." -Sri Sri It's your game. Vile, cruel. Your ignorant, evil web. There's  a special place reserved just for you. I hope you find it well. With gas lights  and my old tears, but mostly my indifference. Never sleep,  plagued with insomnia, so you may spend every second  awake in your abusive bed.

Life with dogs; Means awkwardly cramming yourself into the middle of the loveseat, so neither furball is disturbed.  It's making sure they have enough of the blankets, even though you're cold. It's not moving them off of your arm, even though it's asleep and you have carpal tunnel, but they're snoring and so cute when they sleep.  It's sharing the gooey cheese from your eggs, even though you don't really want to. It's buying the extra smelly dog treats because even though they gross you out, you know they really love them. Means your face will be licked at any given time. Means heading outside in the dark and the cold and the rain so they can go potty, snd then all the drying off and cleaning up afterward.  It's an accidental paw to the throat because they share your bed. It's over $50 per month for insurance because you want them taken care of. It's brushing their teeth with meat-flavored dog toothpaste.  It's having dog hair on every si...

The last left in the woods Sit atop a tiny tree The only one not bare I think I see  A fox beyond it Reddish vulpine run The cover of snow Slowly mushing The end of winter soon But till then  This little tree Stands there alone Significant today 

To watch as you enable every shitty whim To scoff as you inexplicably choose to celebrate him To be embarrassed daily by each new lazy trait To shudder in disbelief at what you should berate To triumph while he falls but never seeing praise To try and squeeze blood from a stone and all the damn cliches  To be done with the three of you, merciless trio of decay To my head held high, to my washed hands, to my waking away